Newly Single? Top Tips For Getting Back Into Dating

Breaking up is a heartbreaking and soul destroying thing. The crying, the loss, the grief and the ever growing feeling that you’re never going to find anyone else!

Whilest, I don’t recommend getting ‘straight’ back on the dating train, it can be a way to heal. It took me a month or so to join Tinder, which for some isn’t long, and for others, it’s a lifetime! 

Below are some of the top tips I wish I’d been given when starting out again, and hope that these can help you lovely newly Single Ladies out there!

1.   Do it when you’re ready! The most important thing I could say to you. Like I said above, it took me one month to actually join Tinder etc, and for me, this still felt too soon. Do not be pressured, but at the same time, although daunting, you will know when you’re ready! 

2.    Get rid of every single trace of the ex. I’ve seen this far too often, photos of the Ex still lingering on social media. Profile pictures etc. To be able to truly move on and get back into the dating game, it really does need to be over. And you also need to know that in your heart. So that teddy he gave you? Throw it out. This is a chance to really cut all ties and move on.

3.    Chose some nice photos. Don’t have any ones you like? Take some! I found this great fun. I invited a few girlfriends over, we had a few drinks, make-overs and took some lovely photos for my profile. It’s a great confidence boost too! But another thing to avoid – too many selfies, I always try to include a few ‘action’ shots too. 

4.    Whilst on the subject of photos, another word of advice would be to not include a picture of yourself with your ex cropped out of it in your profile. It is a much better idea to find a pleasant picture of yourself solo, enjoying yourself!

5.    Consider what you display on your profile carefully. Of course, give little details away, maybe a quote you live by etc. But certainly avoid all talk of the Ex! 

6.    Don’t compare everyone to your ex. He’s your ex for a reason! Remember that!

7.    Don’t rush things. It is best to take things in stages, for example on tinder, maybe have fun swiping, matching, talking, then eventually exchange numbers and then when you both feel happy, then arrange a date. But only do this, if you feel 100% happy and safe doing this. 

8.    And finally, don’t put to much pressure on yourself. I found myself doing this, and you can end up doing more damage than good. After finding out Mr X had already started seeing someone else, I felt ashamed that I hadn’t, so forced myself onto dates, that I was just not ready to go on. Be gentle to yourself, and in time, the right person will come into your life!